c'est une course de chevaux

June 19, 1937 Dear Cedric, A strange thing happened to me today....

Fri, 14 Dec 2012 01:24:36 -0400

June 19, 1937

Dear Cedric,

A strange thing happened to me today. I saw a big thundercloud move down over Half Dome, and it was so big and clear and brilliant that it made me see many things that were drifting around inside of me; things that related to those who are loved and those who are real friends.

For the first time I know what love is; what friends are; and what art should be.

Love is a seeking for a way of life; the way that cannot be followed alone; the resonance of all spiritual and physical things. Children are not only of flesh and blood — children may be ideas, thoughts, emotions. The person of the one who is loved is a form composed of a myriad mirrors reflecting and illuminating the powers and thoughts and the emotions that are within you, and flashing another kind of light from within. No words or deeds may encompass it.

Friendship is another form of love — more passive perhaps, but full of the transmitting and acceptance of things like thunderclouds and grass and the clean granite of reality.

Art is both love and friendship, and understanding; the desire to give. It is not charity, which is the giving of Things, it is more than kindness which is the giving of self. It is both the taking and giving of beauty, the turning out to the light the inner folds of the awareness of the spirit. It is the recreation on another plane of the realities of the world; the tragic and wonderful realities of earth and men, and of all the inter-relations of these.

I wish the thundercloud had moved up over Tahoe and let loose on you; I could wish you nothing finer.

Ansel

Albert Camus - Love of Life For what gives value to travel is...

Thu, 12 Jul 2012 01:01:00 -0300

Albert Camus - Love of Life

For what gives value to travel is fear. It breaks down a kind of inner structure we have. One can no longer cheat—hide behind the hours spent at the office or at the plant (those hours we protest so loudly, which protect us so well from the pain of being alone). I have always wanted to write novels in which my heroes would say: “What would I do without the office?” or again: “My wife has died, but fortunately I have all these orders to fill for tomorrow.” Travel robs us of such refuge. Far from our own people, our own language, stripped of all our props (one doesn’t know the fare on the streetcars, or anything else), we are completely on the surface of ourselves. But also, soul-sick, we restore to every being and every object its miraculous value. A woman dancing without a thought in her head, a bottle on a table, glimpsed behind a curtain: each image becomes a symbol. The whole of life seems reflected in it, insofar as it summarizes our own life at the moment. When we are aware of every gift, the contradictory intoxications we can enjoy (including that of lucidity) are indescribable.

Henry Miller - Tropic of Cancer I need to be alone. I need to...

Thu, 12 Jul 2012 00:16:15 -0300

Henry Miller - Tropic of Cancer

I need to be alone. I need to ponder my shame and my despair in seclusion; I need the sunshine and the paving stones of the streets without companions, without conversation, face to face with myself, with only the music of my heart for company.

Jorge Luis Borges I am not sure that I exist, actually. I am all...

Thu, 12 Jul 2012 00:03:28 -0300

Jorge Luis Borges

I am not sure that I exist, actually. I am all the writers that I have read, all the people that I have met, all the women that I have loved; all the cities I have visited.

mixtape #4

Tue, 21 Feb 2012 13:10:12 -0400

I Often Dream of Trains by Jessicasp on Mixcloud

Paris não tem fim - Enrique Vila-Matas Ontem voltei a revisar...

Mon, 20 Feb 2012 13:35:45 -0400

Paris não tem fim - Enrique Vila-Matas

Ontem voltei a revisar essa alternativa que o livro de Perec oferece entre viver em um lugar ou em muitos, entre ser sedentário ou viajante, entre ser nacionalista rançoso ou nômade de espírito.

“Ou então enraizar-se, encontrar ou dar forma às raízes, arrancar ao espaço o lugar que será o nosso, construir, plantar, apropriar-se milímetro a milímetro da própria casa; pertencer por inteiro ao nosso povoado, saber que alguém é da região de Cevennes ou de Poitou.

“Ou então não levar nada mais além do que se veste, não guardar nada, viver em um hotel e mudar sempre de hotel e de cidade e de país, falar, ler indiferentemente quatro ou cinco línguas; não sentir-se em casa em lugar nenhum, porém sentir-se bem quase em todos os lugares.”

Ontem me diverti uma enormidade ao reencontrar essas linhas de Perec, que resumi deste modo numa cartilha:

“Em definitivo, ir com os netos recolher amoras pelos estreitos caminhos nacionalistas ou viajar e perder países, perdê-los todos viajando nos trens iluminados do mundo noturno, ser estrangeiro sempre.”

maggie and milly and molly and may, E. E. Cummings maggie and...

Sun, 12 Feb 2012 13:28:57 -0400

maggie and milly and molly and may, E. E. Cummings

maggie and milly and molly and may
went down to the beach (to play one day)

and maggie discovered a shell that sang
so sweetly she couldn’t remember her troubles,and

milly befriended a stranded star
whose rays five languid fingers were;

and molly was chased by a horrible thing
which raced sideways while blowing bubbles: and

may came home with a smooth round stone
as small as a world and as large as alone.

For whatever we lose(like a you or a me)
it’s always ourselves we find in the sea

I don’t know why it grieves me so to be without a plan or...

Sat, 04 Feb 2012 17:07:41 -0400

I don’t know why it grieves me so

to be without a plan or a place to go

Tao Te Ching - Laozi (Te Ching, 56) Those who know do not...

Sat, 04 Feb 2012 17:07:31 -0400

Tao Te Ching - Laozi

(Te Ching, 56)

Those who know do not talk.

Those who talk do not know.

Keep your mouth closed.

Guard your senses.

Temper your sharpness.

Simplify your problems.

Mask your brightness.

Be at one with the dust of the Earth.

This is primal union.

He who has achieved this state

Is unconcerned with friends and enemies,

With good and harm,

with honor and disgrace.

This therefore is the highest state of man.

I often dream of trains when I’m alone I ride on them...

Wed, 25 Jan 2012 11:57:11 -0400

I often dream of trains when I’m alone

I ride on them into another zone

I dream of them constantly

Heading for paradise,

or Basingstoke or Reading

Jiddu Krishnamurti - Silence (Commentaries on Living) The car...

Wed, 25 Jan 2012 11:37:54 -0400

Jiddu Krishnamurti - Silence (Commentaries on Living)

The car stopped at the houses. The barking of the dog, the unpacking of the car and the general disturbances in no way affected this extraordinary silence. There was no disturbance, and the stillness went on. The wind was among the pines, the shadows were long, and a wildcat sneaked away among the bushes. In this silence there was movement, and the movement was not a distraction. There was no fixed attention from which to be distracted. There is distraction when the main interest shifts; but in this silence there was absence of interest, and so there was no wandering away. Movement was not away from the silence but was of it. It was the stillness, not of death, of decay, but of life in which there was a total absence of conflict. With most of us, the struggle of pain and pleasure, the urge of activity, gives us the sense of life; and if that urge were taken away, we should be lost and soon disintegrate. But this stillness and its movement was creation ever renewing itself. It was a movement that had no beginning and so had no ending; nor was it a continuity. Movement implies time; but here there was no time. Time is the more and the less, the near and the far, yesterday and tomorrow; but in this stillness all comparison ceased. It was not a silence that came to an end to begin again; there was no repetition. The many tricks of the cunning mind were wholly absent.

Derrick Jensen - A Language Older Than Words What if the point...

Sun, 15 Jan 2012 14:48:21 -0400

Derrick Jensen - A Language Older Than Words

What if the point of life has nothing to do with the creation of an ever-expanding region of control? What if the point is not to keep at bay all those people, beings, objects and emotions that we so needlessly fear? What if the point instead is to let go of that control? What if the point of life, the primary reason for existence, is to lie naked with your lover in a shady grove of trees? What if the point is to taste each other’s sweat and feel the delicate pressure of finger on chest, thigh on thigh, lip on cheek? What if the point is to stop, then, in your slow movements together, and listen to the birdsong, to watch the dragonflies hover, to look at your lover’s face, then up at the undersides of leaves moving together in the breeze? What if the point is to invite these others into your movement, to bring trees, wind, grass, dragonflies into your family and in so doing abandon any attempt to control them? What if the point all along has been to get along, to relate, to experience things on their own terms? What if the point is to feel joy when joyous, love when loving, anger when angry, thoughtful when full of thought? What if the point from the beginning has been to simply be?

I don’t mind failing in this world,I don’t mind...

Sun, 15 Jan 2012 14:48:00 -0400

I don’t mind failing in this world,
I don’t mind failing in this world,
Don’t mind wearing the ragged britches
‘Cause those who succeed are the sons of bitches,
I don’t mind failing in this world.

Jiddu Krishnamurti - Aloness and Isolation (Commentaries on...

Tue, 10 Jan 2012 14:47:00 -0400

Jiddu Krishnamurti - Aloness and Isolation (Commentaries on Living)

A few chattering villagers passed by on their bicycles, and once again there was deep silence and that peace which comes when all things are alone. This aloneness is not aching, fearsome loneliness. It is the aloneness of being; it is uncorrupted, rich, complete.

I break horsesThey seem to come to meAsking to be brokenThey...

Mon, 19 Dec 2011 10:10:47 -0400

I break horses
They seem to come to me
Asking to be broken
They seem to run to me
I break horses
Doesn’t take me long
Just a few well-placed words
And their wandering hearts are gone

At first her warmth felt good between my legs
Living breathing heart-beating flesh
But soon that warmth turned to an itch
Turned to a scratch
Turned to a gash
I break horses
I don’t tend to them

Tonight I’m swimming to my favorite island
And I don’t want to see you swimming behind
Tonight I’m swimming to my favorite island
And I don’t want to see you swimming behind
No I break horses
I don’t tend to them

love is the whole thing we are only pieces.

Thu, 01 Dec 2011 23:05:00 -0400

love is the whole thing

we are only pieces.

Gil Scott-Heron - Running Because I always feel like...

Wed, 02 Nov 2011 23:26:05 -0300

Gil Scott-Heron - Running

Because I always feel like running.

Not away, because there’s no such place.

Because if there was, I would have found it by now.

Because it’s easier to run,

Easier than staying and finding out you’re the only one, who didn’t run.

Because running will be the way your life and mine will be described,

As in, ‘the long run’ or

As in, ‘having given someone a run for their money’ or

As in, ‘running out of time’.

Because running makes me look like everyone else, though I hope there will never be cause for that.

Because I will be running in the other direction,

Not running for cover.

Because if I knew where cover was,

I would stay there and never have to run for it.

Not running for my life

Because I have to be running for something of more value to be running, and not in fear.

Because the thing I fear cannot be escaped, eluded, avoided, hidden from, protected from, gotten away from,

Not without showing the fear, as I see it now,

Because closer, clearer, no-sir, nearer

Because of you, and because of that nice,

That you quietly, quickly be causing

And because you going to see me run soon

And because you going to know why I’m running then,

You’ll know then, because I’m not,

Going to tell you

Now.

Béla Tarr (2001) You know how it happens, when we started we...

Sat, 22 Oct 2011 15:25:56 -0300

Béla Tarr (2001)

You know how it happens, when we started we had a big social responsibility which I think still exists now. And back then I thought “Okay, we have some social problems in this political system – maybe we’ll just deal with the social question.” And afterwards when we made a second movie and a third we knew better that there are not only social problems. We have some ontological problems and now I think a whole pile of shit is coming from the cosmos. And there’s the reason. You know how we open out step by step, film by film. It’s very difficult to speak about the metaphysical and that. No. It’s just always listening to life. And we are thinking about what is happening around us. I just think about the quality of human life and when I say “shit” I think I’m very close to it. Everything is much bigger than us.

mixtape #3

Sun, 02 Oct 2011 14:50:00 -0300

Yuki Yukite shingun by Jessicasp on Mixcloud

Roads of Kiarostami (2006) From the first he had borne within...

Thu, 29 Sep 2011 15:36:00 -0300

Roads of Kiarostami (2006)

From the first he had borne within him a great sorrow which made him flee the company of others and kept him shut away indoors. It had been so ever since a mourner had told him ‘which beautiful face does not end up buried in dust?’ A great grief settled on him shattering his tranquillity. People asked of him ‘what pains you?’ He told them what had occurred and that his heart was cold at this world. ‘Something has come over me. I know of no way through it and neither books nor degrees yield an answer.’

They told him that home held no refuge for him, that he must set out down the road, keep silence and regard the path: ‘the road itself will yield the answer to your heart’s thousand questions.’

And he went in search of the road. The road was continuous, without end, a winding road leading nowhere. Criss-crossed lines on a page of dust like the lines of a child’s game drawn on paper.

People are like ants, in search of their daily bread discovering routes for travel and travel itself. And last, when he beheld the path, he saw the tale of man: that man has one road in life, running from the end to the beginning down which he is endlessly searching for meaning. And in this boundless existence, each has his own road. Sometimes endless, winding, sometimes leading nowhere, sometimes a straight line, a path leading to a garden, the shade of a tree, a spring in rocky ground.

And the body is the pack animal of the soul that carries it from place to place. Whoever neglecls his pack animal will never reach his journey’s end. But the journey of man continues.

Our roads are like ourselves - sometimes stony, sometimes paved; sometimes winding, sometimes straight. And the paths we draw on the earth are like scratches upon it. And we have other ways inside us - ways of sadness, ways of joy; ways of love, ways of thought; ways of escape and sometimes ways which spring from hatred; ways which destroy us, ways which go nowhere, ways without a conclusion like a stagnant river.

The road is man’s confession of the places he is fleeing from the places he is heading.

The road is life, the road is man.